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Mar. 23rd, 2020


It's my 10 Years In Japan anniversary!!


Jan. 14th, 2019

Long Live The Queen

My grandmother is dying.

Great way to start the new year, right?

My favorite person in the world, the person who raised me my entire life, at 97 years old, is taking her last breaths right now.

When my grandfather died, it was very sudden. He was himself one day, and then gone the next. He died with a book on his pillow, as if he had been reading. And I think that's better. The last time I talked with him, our parting was a pleasant "See ya!"

But Grandma is wasting away. She got really sick last week, something about her bowel collapsing, though I don't know details, and now she's receiving hospice care at my uncle's place in Arizona. They said she has 5-7 days to live.

So I was desperate to talk to her, to tell her I'm sorry for being so distant and how wonderful she is for never giving up on me. I wanted to tell her what a great job she did raising me and all of her children, bringing us up to be so strong of spirit and independent. I wanted to tell her how much I love her.

But I was also scared, because when I said goodbye, I knew it was likely to be for the last time, and I didn't know if I would be able to do that.

I worked it out with my family to do a video chat with her, and when I saw her, I was shocked. For some reason, I was expecting her to be her normal self, just sick. Instead, she was barely there - so weak, unable to move, barely able to talk. I don't know if it's awful of me, but my very first thought was that I hope she passes soon, so that her suffering will end.

I talked with her for a little bit, but the rest of my family, almost all of whom have traveled to Arizona to see her, was so excited to talk with me, that it wasn't long before I was being passed around to say hi to everyone, or to let them tell me all about what they've been up to. Then I got to talk with Grandma a little bit more, just a minute or so, until my family decided it was time to end the call. I was still trying to get out a goodbye when someone else jumped into the call to talk to me, and then disconnected the call.

I didn't get to tell her any of the things I wanted to tell her. I didn't even get to say goodbye, not really, and I'm kind of mad about that. At the same time, though, if given another chance, I don't even know if I could. I don't know if the words would come out.

I'm thinking of trying to call again tomorrow. I think some of the people there will be gone by then, and it should be a little quieter. Maybe I can get another chance, even though I'm so unsure if it's the right thing to do.

I just hope it won't be too late.


Apr. 25th, 2016

10 years


Can you believe I've spent 10 years with this guy!?

I've had him so long. Though it sounds stupid, he's had a really big impact on my life. He helped me through some of the toughest times of my life by inspiring me and sparking my creativity. He's given me cathartic distraction when I needed to get away from the real world, and has made me laugh so much. He's absolutely precious, and I wouldn't be the same without him.

Here's to another 10 years, mein liebe~

Mar. 10th, 2014

He's 6

In the very least, Antonio is pleased that within 17 minutes of the day starting, I remembered it's his birthday. .^^

So, Happy Birthday, you obnoxious brat. I ♥ U


Mar. 7th, 2014

doll meme, just because

I have seriously not felt like doing anything for a while now. Various things have been going on, and I just don't feel like talking about them, even though I do. (I guess it's more like, I wish I could sit down with someone and talk over a cup of coffee or something, but since I don't have any friends, it's impossible. But I certainly don't feel like writing about things because it's just too much of an effort.)

So instead of doing anything productive, I'll waste my time with doll-related BS.

taken from Tumblr )

The new boy finally has a name, by the way. Now I just need to work on his look, and I can properly introduce him.
(Though I realize I still haven't given Decca a real introduction yet either. Oops...)

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Jan. 27th, 2014

It's a good time to be Free!

Free! gets a season twooooooooooooooo!

Of course, I was there in the audience when they announced it at the seiyuu talk event, and being the big, blubbering idiot that I am, I had tears streaming down my face. .^^;;; I couldn't help it! And I probably wasn't the only one.

Anyway, I have something of a review of the event up on Tumblr, and it's totally recommended reading. ;P

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Dec. 23rd, 2013


Woo~ Fantastic new layout, courtesy of [info]cashew! Thanks for letting me use it! I absolutely love the background, and the way links look.
It's actually been over four years since I changed the layout on this thing. Heh.. I really loved the one I had before, so never felt the desire to change it, until this one was made. .^^
Now I kinda want to make a mood theme to go with it, which sounds like so much more fun than cleaning my apartment.

In other news, tomorrow is my last day of work before winter vacation starts. My annual winter trip this year will be to Ise Shrine in Mie prefecture, then a short jaunt down to Kobe (not for any particular reason, I assure you....), then over to Miyajima, to spend New Year's at Itsukushima Shrine, and New Year's Day hiking Mt. Misen. After that, I'll spend a couple days wandering around Hiroshima.

I realize, of course, that I still haven't posted my travel log or pictures from last year's Kyoto/Nara trip. .>_>

Last year I sent a postcard to my family every day or so during my trip, but they never said anything. I don't even know if they ever received them. So I don't think I'll bother this year. Of course, then they'll act like I'm some kind of asshole, as usual, when all I've done or haven't done is the same damn things they do or don't do.

Now, how should I do my mood theme...?

Dec. 18th, 2013

so music! such voice! wow!

Wow wow wow!

I am actually blown away at how perfect their voices sound together!! =D =D

I'm also torn, because I decided I wouldn't buy any of the duet CDs until they were all out, so I could buy them all together and get the free box and bromide. And I told myself I couldn't download the songs as they were released, because if I did I just know I'd lose all incentive to buy CDs. I can listen online, but no downloading! Which means I won't be able to put them on my iPod until they're all out. But... but they won't all be released until March 2014. .;__;

Must be strong!

Oh, also, they're totally wearing couples' rings. X3

..... Damn. I may as well make a Free! tag on here.

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Nov. 28th, 2013

60010 / 50000 (120.02%)

Nov. 24th, 2013


51888 / 50000 (103.78%)

That means I did it! Yaaay!

I made the goal, that is. But the story is still only less than 2/3 done. .^^
I'll keep on a-writin' until the 29th, then verify my word count at that time. ... Then continue writing, until the story is finished. .^^

But I'm really excited! =D
And super tired! Oh my goodness, is it really 5:30 in the morning?


Nov. 18th, 2013

also, randomly

I enjoy that there is official art of Nagisa sitting on Rei's lap.

That is all.

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Nov. 17th, 2013

40460 / 50000 (80.92%)

Almost there!!!

Now, don't tell So-And-So, but this story is, like, all Harley. .^^
It was supposed to be equal parts Harley and Antonio, but of the 40,000 words so far, only about 7,000 of them are Antonio's part. .^^;;

He's going to kill me when he finds out.

Either way, the story itself is now officially half done (3 of 6 parts written). That means if we keep up like this, it could end up being an 80,000 word story. =D

Which, I would like to mention if I haven't already, I finished writing Clay's story recently. That story was originally supposed to be a one-shot, but kind of got really out of hand. .^^ So at 70,400+ words, it's currently officially the longest thing I've ever written, beating out even last year's NaNo novel.

.... I repeat... It was supposed to be a one-shot.

But I recommend it! =D

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Nov. 14th, 2013

still working at it

31019 / 50000 (62.04%)

I'm pretty ahead of the target, I think, but I still feel like I'm lagging behind. I've had so many times where I'm like, I just don't feel like writing right now. It's sad.


Nov. 7th, 2013

more and more

21760 / 50000 (43.52%)

This one's actually accurate. .^^

I did get a good head start over the holiday day, but now my progress and momentum have slowed a lot. Which is sad, considering it's been less than a week since I started.

But then, it's been less than a week, and I'm almost halfway to the goal already. ... And I've only written 1.5 out of 6 parts. .>_> So either this story is all rambley bullshit (hint: it is), or it's a masterpiece (hint: it's not).

Spoiler: it's explaining quite a bit about Antonio's eyes. =3

Nov. 4th, 2013

Start those progress bars

13936 / 50000 (27.87%)

Like last year, my progress bars won't accurately reflect how much I've actually done. Since I write everything out by hand, with a pencil and paper, then have to type it up, this is simply where I stopped typing.

I think right now I'm actually at around 15,000 words.


Yes, I wrote 15,000 words... in three days. .O_O


Oct. 31st, 2013

NaNoWriMo part two!

In case anyone is wondering, yes, I am going to attempt NaNoWriMo again this year. Only because I didn't technically finish the story last year. (I kind of ended it with a cliffhanger.. Heh..) So this year should be the stunning conclusion, which at least one person has been begging me for for almost a year now. (And you have no idea how happy it makes me that I have a fan. Even if it's just one.)

So things will be kicking off here in just short of an hour. I don't know how it'll go, since the story from here isn't as clear to me as part one was, but I'll try my best!
I'm grateful that the first day happens to be my day off, and Monday is a national holiday, so I'll have an extra day free to lock myself away and scribble words. Hopefully, it'll give me a good head start.


Series: Back of the Sun - Another Side, Book Two
Characters: Antonio, G√ľnter, Stefano, James, Harley, probably everyone at some point or another
Genre: Action, romance, porn, etc.
Currently at: 2,863 13,936 40,460 51,888

Wish me luck!

(P.S. If you haven't read Book One and want to, it's here.)

Sep. 26th, 2013



Just watched the last episode of Free!.

And I am literally feeling so many conflicting emotions, all at the same time.

cut just in case of spoilers )

And that's without seeing it subtitled yet.
Now I'll go to bed and fume/weep/wibble into my pillow, and wake up to subs tomorrow.

This series will be the death of me.

....... Ai. X3

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Sep. 23rd, 2013

To be fair, it was delicious.

Quote of the day:

"I don't know what the fuck is wrong with me but I keep drooling all over this god damn sandwich."

Sep. 19th, 2013

Falling so deep

Wow... Just, fucking... WOW.

Episode 11 was intense.

Nerd rage~!

Next week is the last episode. I'll probably curl up into a ball and die from heartbreak.

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Sep. 9th, 2013

Random anime meme

Taken from Tumblr.

Choose 5 anime shows you like before reading the questions.

1. Free!
2. Prince of Tennis
3. Giant Killing
4. K
5. Kuroko no Basket

And the questions... )

It was around question #14 that I realized four of the five series I chose were sports series. .^^;;

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